Was I Really THAT BIG of An Asshole?

So, years and pounds ago, I was a good lookin' kid.

I could get chicks to do things, within minutes of meeting them, that would make their parents cringe.

A Few Examples

BJ
I'm in high school and at Six Flags with my buddies. I meet this girl in an arcade and quickly sense that she's not of the highest moral character.

To make a long story short, she ends up giving me her number, and later that night, I call her.

She says her mom's out of town and she's all alone...she wants some company...could I come over and stay with her?

So, being a high school kid with an ever present erection, I say yes.

I call my buddies and tell them that I know of a house with no parents. Remember, in high school, you were always looking for a place to drink...

So, three of my buddies and I pile into my car and drive out there.

I'm not there five minutes, and she leads me down the hall and into her bedroom.

She shuts the door and I'll leave the rest up to you...

I saw her a couple times that summer, and as a matter of fact, me and my friends gave her a nickname.

Apparently we weren't the only ones...

I'd openly refer to her by the nickname and when I'd call her house and her mom would answer, I'd ask for BJ and her mom would say "She's here. One moment please."

Blind Date
Sort of...

I heard through my friend Van, that a friend of his sister really liked to "service" guys.

So, naturally I was like "dude! set me up!"

Which he did.

So, we went out on a double date.

My date sat in the front seat and Van and his date sat in the rear...of my 1979 Camaro...cozy.

We drive aimlessly for an hour or so, and then the sun goes down.

I decide it's time to "test the waters", so I pull into a secluded construction site. My date and I exit the car, and leave Van and his date in the back seat, to get better acquainted.

I walk into some tall brush and she's walking slightly ahead of me. She turns to me and says "I don't know if I'm ready to sleep with you yet."

I've known her for an hour and she says this.

Me, ever quick on my feet, simply respond "Oh, I didn't expect you to. I just want a blow job."

"Oh, is that it?"

ZZZZZIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPP

The "Sleep-Over Friend
Van was always a great source for girls. Not that he had a harem, but his sister had A LOT of cute friends who were only two or three years younger than us.

Any time I spent the night at Van's there was one girl, who in particular, I would always tell Van to have his sister ask to spend the night too.

Anyway, we built a history in that any time I spent the night, she spent the night, you get the picture.

So, I come home one particular evening, no wait, that's George Thoroughgood...Anyway, Van and I were fucking around at his house, playing Nintendo, who knows?? and we decide to take a drive to see if we can find something else to do.

We get to the end of his street, and we see two girls.

One is my "sleep-over" friend and the other is a friend of his sister's.

Vince is like "dude, see if they need a ride."

I pull to the curb and ask them if they need a lift somewhere (I know, it's quite Chester...but I was seventeen). Since they live at least 4 miles away, they quickly respond YES!

I have only one caveat...I tell my "friend" that I want "a favor".

She thinks I'm kidding and giggles as she gets into the car.

I head toward her house and then take a detour to a rural area a few minutes away.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I'm typing this...yet I can't beleive I did it. What a scum bag.

I park the car and get out.

She's like "Are you serious??? Aaarrgghhh! Not tonight! I have to get home! My parents will kill me if I'm late!"

To which I respond, "The sooner you do it, the sooner I can take you home..."

We stroll down the hill and leave Van and the other girl to become more acquainted.

Ten minutes later, we stroll back up the hill and I drive the girls home...just a few minutes late.

I talk to Van later, who is still a flaming virgin at this point, and he told me he tried to "mess around" with the girl, but she just wouldn't...he even used his best line on her "We know eachother don't we? We like eachother, don't we?"

Now THAT'S Chester...

Looking back, knowing what I know now, and what beautiful souls women are, I'm horrified at my actions.

Don't get me wrong, as a 17 year old kid, it was the time of my life...but God help the first punk that arrives at my house in a 1979 Camaro to take my daughter on a date...LOCK N' LOAD!