Why Kids Are Fat and Socially Retarded

A line of suburban housewives, in their Escalades, Touregs and Grand Caravans, line the street at the top of my neighborhood twice each day.

Why?

To wait for the school bus and pick up from the school bus? Why else?

I've noticed this disturbing trend for the past few years. We all know that parents of today think their kids can do no wrong, and aren't one quarter of the disciplinarians our parents were, but parents are coddling their kids to the point of obesity and social retardation.

Waiting in each car, not at the bus stop mind you, every morning are dozens of children waiting with Mommy for the bus. Repeat the procedure every afternoon. Instead of getting some exercise, Junior, Missy, Tommy, Ben, Sally, Ahmed and Julius just hop into waiting vans every afternoon. What happened to hanging out, being kids, waiting for the bus? What happened to building social skills? What happened to walking two or three blocks home from the bus stop with your friends?

MY GOD!

I suppose everybody gets a trophy too at the end of the baseball season. Even the, oops, there are no winners and losers any more.